Home Again Home Again Jiggity-Jig!
I have to say, writing is like exercise: the more you stay away from it, the harder it is to pick it up again! And while I’m on the subject of exercise:
I have been plugging along in the fitness department. I mentioned in a post (The Dreaded Topic) I wrote about 2 months ago that I embarked on a fitness regime (alright, this is weird, I just went back to that post… June 5, it is now August 5th!). So how have the last 2 months been? Let me refresh your memory of my baseline: walking upstairs to my bedroom was probably the most I exerted myself prior to taking on this challenge. I wish I could say I am exaggerating for effect. So my plan going in, for those that did not read: do something physical every day. I picked 20 minutes as my start time. I guest posted early on over at Running On Sober, so I don’t remember the specifics, but for the first probably 5 or 6 weeks I did exactly that… every single day. I started on the machine with which I was most comfortable (elliptical machine), but then I decided that going with comfort when it comes to exercise has never served me well, so I started mixing it up. Here are some examples of the progress made within 2 months:
Elliptical Start time/mileage: 20 minutes, 1.25 miles, about 100 calories, Current: 45 minutes, 4 miles, 450 calories burned
Swimming Start: 6 laps, Current: 25 laps
Stationary Bike: no stats to report, it hurt my knee, but the fact that I did it at all is something
Local Walking Start: barely a mile, small loop within my development; Current: I have built up to a 3.1 mile loop that starts in my development but extends beyond it
And, last but not least, the treadmill (or Dreadmill, as I thought of it)…
Start: probably struggled to walk a mile around 20 minutes (I did not keep track of those early stats), Currently (as of yesterday): 46 minutes, 3.1 miles, interval walking/running
Now, none of these number are going to be making headlines over at ESPN, but the point is the progress in an incredibly short period of time. There aren’t any major physical changes, but the mental ones are astounding. Here’s the biggest example: about 5 weeks into this commitment, I got an email from my unbelievably fitness-minded sister-in-law. She knows of my new commitment, and has been encouraging me all she can. She is the type to run in triathlons, half-marathons, mud runs, and other insane things, so she gets emails about local events regularly. She forwarded one onto me: a sober 5k walk/run sponsored by the Caron Foundation, and offered to walk it with me if I was interested.
Now, let’s pause and consider the information I gave you earlier: 2 months ago, ZERO exercise daily, never in my life have I been a sports-oriented person, never competed in anything physical… and now I am actually CONSIDERING this?!?!
Yes, I am. I wanted to reply no, hit the delete button, and never think about it again, but I couldn’t do it. So, first, I told my husband, who was encouraging and supportive, as always. Next, I let my recovery-and-fitness-minded blogging friends know of this recent development, and, predictably, all are strongly encouraging me to do it (Bye Bye Beer has graciously offered to walk it with me, bless her soul!). Finally, I started seeing if I could physically even do it, and to that end found local 3.1 miles loops, did treadmill workouts, in an attempt to get my time down. My commitment to myself is this (and yes, I know I will be getting yelled at by my “exercise sponsor,” as I like to think of Christy, for not just signing up): take the month of August and see what progress I can make in increasing running/decreasing walking for the 3.1 mile sessions. Since it is only August 5, I’ve got some time, I will check back in on this subject in a few weeks!
Final mental breakthrough, and then I’ll stop rambling. As it turns out, there was a promenade near the house that I stayed in last week that was flat, paved, and exactly 1.5 miles long (another sign, in my opinion!), so I did that a few times last week. Still being new to this whole outdoor running/walking gig, while at the same time being technologically handicapped when it comes to ipods, my playlists are disorganized and often interrupted with tween music. So as I’m doing the “ralk,” as I call it, on the promenade, a song keeps coming up that was popular a year or two ago with the Disney crowd, It’s called “Who Says” by Selena Gomez. I remember when my daughter listened to it a lot, and I remember thinking it a cute song, but that’s about it. Now, as I’m regularly exercising, the music is an integral part in the process, and I am listening intently to the songs. And this one is haunting me, although I don’t know why. So I’m actually running as I think to myself, “pay closer attention and figure out why this song is bothering you.” And the chorus comes on:
Who says, who says you’re not perfect?
Who says you’re not worth it?
Who says you’re the only one who’s hurting?
Trust me, that’s the price of beauty!
Who says you’re not pretty?
Who says you’re not beautiful
And, just like that, my mind talked back to the questions, and said, “You say it, and you’re the only one who says it.” And I thought of all the people in my life, and the voice is right… I am the only one saying negative things about me. Well, immediately I started to cry, and now I am running down an extremely crowded promenade with tears streaming down my face. I refused to make eye contact, but I can only imagine what the hell those people were thinking!
Even though it is the sappiest song ever, it is staying on my playlist, as a reminder that I only have one critic, and she has a proven spotty track record when it comes to making these judgments!
12 people at my meeting today, not a record, but a great number!
Posted on August 5, 2013, in Self-Care and tagged Addiction, Caron Foundation, Elliptical trainer, ESPN, Health, Physical exercise, Physical fitness, Recovery, running, Selena Gomez, self-development, Who Says. Bookmark the permalink. 26 Comments.