Symptom Checker


Did you ever go on the WebMD site to research a condition?  I would doubt that I would be able to find my particular ailment easily, but if I could, it would look something like this:


Symptoms, Early Stage:

  • Initial success with accomplishment of a goal leads to an increased momentum of goal setting (as in, now that I’ve stopped smoking and have lost a few pounds, let’s keep the health train going and start an official diet by counting points, buy a fitbit and count steps, train for a 5K and log miles, and of course there’s always the scale)
  • Distracted thought processes (wait, which goal should I be working on right now… oh wait, I have children who need their dinner!)

Symptoms, Middle Stage:

  • Irritability (leave me alone, can’t you see I’m trying to calculate all I’ve eaten today/steps I’ve taken today/average minutes per mile today?)
  • Confusion (what exactly am I supposed to be doing right now?)

Symptoms, Advanced Stage:

  • Deal making (if I get on the scale and the number is the same or less than yesterday, then I am doing well and should continue, if not, then I will… give up/throw the scale out the window/throw myself out the window)
  • Negative self-talk reaches new heights (no matter what good is achieved on a given day, the negative voice can combat with all the goals that were not achieved)

Diagnosis #1:

  • You are certifiable, go out and get fitted with a straitjacket

Diagnosis #2 (because life actually does have to move on):

  • You are suffering from a condition called “Overshooting The Goal-Setting Mark.”  Fortunately, this condition can be arrested and corrected with a few simple steps.

Treatment and Care:

  • Acknowledgment of condition.  Say to yourself, “you are heading in too many directions, and as a result, you are getting nowhere fast”
  • Next, take some deep breaths, and remember all for which you are grateful (this step, by the way, helps with a lot of mental conditions)
  • Once in a calm state, take quiet time, pick one goal, and Let.  The.  Rest.  Go.
  • Give voice to the confusion and negativity in your head with a trusted friend (or the entire blogging world, or both)
  • Repeat these steps each time the condition flares up

Today’s Miracle:

Today is a day of rest… no accounting of anything today, and I am going to enjoy it!

Posted on May 15, 2014, in Self-Care and tagged , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 17 Comments.

  1. Ha ha…love this, Josie! Love the format here – funny and yet insightful. I can so relate and am actually very grateful to read this this morning. I too am trying to hit too many goals in a haphazard way, and feeling a bit overwhelmed! For example, in my running, I am trying to do too many things – I changed shoes, am changing my form, changing cadence, trying too many training programs and also demanding my weight go down! No wonder I have a bit of a calf / ankle injury! But that’s okay. I am going to do what you suggest – breath. Slow things down. Talk to others (there is a guy at work who I recently hired, and he is a runner with a capital “R”, so I run things past him).

    Love this. congrats and continued luck (or whatever you want to call it – work, grace, etc 🙂 ) with your goals. I know you can do it 🙂


    Liked by 1 person

  2. I can really relate to this. I’m not just quitting alcohol, I’m losing weight, getting fit, reading more, being less grumpy with my kids, deciding what I am going to do with the rest of my life and finding a rewarding job. Or at least, that was my plan. Am doing OK with the first one, that’s all. I need to take note of your treatment and care 🙂 Thanks for the post! xxx

    Liked by 1 person

    • Oh my goodness, I took a break from replying to these comments to take a read on your blog, and I’m still laughing! Such a great post on boxed wine, I can’t wait to read more!

      And, of course, I thank you for this comment. Sometimes (like this post) I will think to myself, “Yep, this is the one where you’re going to hear crickets, because no one thinks as nonsensically as you do!” And each time, I am heartened to find there are others like me!


  3. THANK YOU for posting this… I go to WebMD for every ache & pain, lol. Thi sis so me, I get so many goals, my Type A personality I dive into so many goals at once and then a mnth later i am no where and dissapointed. Even my BF said when I first started AA and sobriety, I will try to do it all and then I will get burned out. (I never knew how much he really knows/gets me, quite scary) So that is why I am just focusing on my sobriety. If I sleep more and don’t exercise that is ok. If I eat sugar to not drink wine fine. If I have to buy another bigger pair of pants, that is ok. Once I get a good grip on my sobriety, I can start focusing on more exercise, less calories etc. If I try to do it all at once, I will fail. I don’t want to give up my sobriety no matter what. Enjoy your day of rest! XOXO


    • MB, I am so, so so glad you commented, and I hope everyone reading scrolls down to read what you wrote, it is truly the best part. Because, no matter how far off the rails I go in terms of diet and exercise, I do know, as long as I’m sober it will be okay.

      Thank you, again, for the critical post script to this post!


  4. This is great! Before I quit drinking, I spent way too much time on WedMD looking up my ailments hoping to figure out what disease I had for I was sure I was dying.
    Hmm.. Fast forward to present day and I no longer have any physical ailments to speak of.Take care of you and the rest will be okay. Great format for talking about your feelings.


  5. Yeah, I can relate a lot too. Though I know it would be best to weigh myself only once a week (on Thursdays because that has historically been the lightest day of the week for me, go figure), I do almost every day of the week. I make bargains with myself before I step on the scale. I know it’s not healthy and I know I need to cut it out. Changing eating habits has been much harder than exercising regularly, but I see the latter as progress. I’ve definitely stepped back from setting too many goals, simply because I fail at most of them. Welcome to the world of the underachiever. Also, I too really liked the format and humor and thoughtfulness behind this post. Great stuff, J.


    • Kristen, I forgot to tell you this. You told me before that Thursday is your best weigh-in day, and guess what day I selected?!? I’m not sure what logic has me assuming that your lowest-number-weigh-in day will be mine, but, for better or for worse, the “official” weekly weight is Thursday, and that is thanks to you!

      Now, having said that, I need a 12-step program for eliminating the scale, seriously. I tried and failed again this morning not to get on it.

      I take comfort in knowing that I am not alone, so I do appreciate your comments, as always!


      • This week I waited until this morning to weigh in. It was your reply that prompted this, and yesterday I almost caved. It’s such a ridiculous thing though, not being able to wait and torturing myself so. So I weighed in this morning and it was fine, good, about where I hoped to be but was sure I wouldn’t be. I don’t want to be a slave to the damn thing. Once a week is plenty, so going to keep at this for next week, one day a time of course.


      • Oh, Kristen, you don’t know how bad I needed to see someone making progress on an issue this morning, thank you so much for the follow-up, and great job. Hopefully you will inspire me to progress a little myself!


  6. Love this, Josie! I can’t tell you how many times I’ve used WebMD and determined that I had some horrible ailment, only to feel fine the next day!
    I’m also at a point in my recovery where I feel like there are other things I need to work on, like breaking my addiction to sugar, taking off some weight, and getting more exercise…it’s not easy. And I keep thinking to myself, I quit drinking for crying out loud, why can’t I stop eating chocolate?? Ugh. Work in progress, I guess.
    Great post!


  7. Josie, Josie, Josie … You are killing me with this. All of us friends here on the blogoshere are such a bunch of maniacs, always trying to achieve, achieve, achieve. Damn. I am the most guilty of all. (I do this with others as an occupation.)

    I love your miracle today. This is an excellent post for my Sunday. I decided I was going to post one week and then spend the next week reading (newest set of goals). So as soon as I finish paling around with my blog friends I’m going to ditch the goals for today and have fun with my family.

    I love you so much.


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