The Higher the Expectations, the Lower the Serenity

Another stellar Monday meeting… 14 attendees, which ties the record!

The beauty of running your own meeting is having the authority to tailor the content to suit your own life circumstances.  I really needed to hear a well-known story in the Big Book, and since this is the first Monday in May, I got to select it.  The image above is an oft-quoted paragraph from the story entitled “Acceptance is the Answer.”

I have written about this story several times in the past 15 months.  When I was just starting out, I attended numerous meetings that featured it, until I finally grasped its importance, and now I only get to hear it when I choose it (which I do, at every opportunity).  If you have a copy of the Big Book, pull it out and read it… it contains a powerful message.

Why is it so difficult to accept people, places and things exactly as they are?  I know, as an alcoholic/addict, that it was in the acceptance of my disease that I found relief, and a solution.  So why is it so tough to use that same formula with the rest of life?

When I perceive that I’ve been wronged, I will lose serenity in an instant, and it becomes astonishingly difficult to climb out of the hole I have dug for myself.  Once in the hole of resentment, I have perfect recall of all past times I have been similarly wronged, and the hole becomes deeper.  I react in kind, believing myself justified because, after all, I have been wronged!  Of course, I am conveniently forgetting the old adage that two wrongs do not make a right… and the hole gets deeper.

So how do I climb out of the hole?  Reading the paragraph in the image above is an excellent start.  When I can truly accept others as they are, and look to what I can change (my thoughts, my actions/reactions, and, consequently, my feelings), I start living in the solution rather than the problem.  And when I live in the solution, rather than the problem, the problem tends to dissipate.

Today, I am starting with the man (woman) in the mirror, and I’m asking him (her) to change his (her) ways!

Today’s Miracle:

Using Michael Jackson lyrics to support recovery is a miracle…


Posted on May 6, 2013, in Monday Meeting Miracles and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 3 Comments.

  1. Simple reminder I needed – thanks as always my friend!


  2. I have nominated you for a ‘shine on’ award. To accept and participate in the fun, go here:
    Keep up the great work!


  3. Possibly the best story with the best message in the book (outside of Bill W’s). I have been asked to read those pages often by counselors and my sponsor in my first I still need to have that stapled to my forehead. A perfect ideal, and difficult to perfect, but doable, and it’s something to keep at top of mind.

    Congrats on your record tying attendance! i am still in awe of you starting that group. I don’t think I have it in me to do something like that – that’s service, I tell you. You’re covered for the next two years at least…ha ha.

    the thing about holes we dig…normal people will stop digging and get themselves out. Alcoholics, when they get into a hole like that, like to decorate. That’s what we do, yes? Oh dear…ha ha.

    Wonderful post and wonderful reminder…acceptance. That is the key.

    (The author of that story, Dr. Paul O has a book out {I have to look it up} and here is a talk he made – check it out –



Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

losing anonymously

Learning to balance healthy and happy while living a full and busy life!

Oh for the love

Just another 50+ woman trying to get her shit together.

Guitars and Life

Blog about life by a music obsessed middle aged recovering alcoholic from South East England


I got sober. Life got big.


From daily wine drinker to alcohol free living...this is my journey.

The emotional messy stuff...

Vodka Goggles

No longer seeing the world through vodka colored glasses..


An Irish Mindfulness Meditation Blog: Practicing calm, wellness, meaning and a happier life.


Today is the first day of the rest of my life. Starting today I am on my way.


Trying to ace sober living

Emotional Sobriety And Food

"... to be able to Twelfth Step ourselves and others into emotional sobriety" -- living, loving & letting go.

girl gone sober.

a blog about living sober. i didn't always drink beer but when i did i drank a lot of it. stay sober my friends.

The Sober Garden

Jettisoning the heavy stuff...

The Six Year Hangover


Process Not An Event

Adventures in Addiction Recovery & Cancer Survival

Michelle R. Terry

Writer - Photographer - Dreamer

%d bloggers like this: