Resentments, Part 2

Holding resentment is like eating poison and waiting for the other person to keel over.  -Unknown

The subtitle of this post is “Be Careful What You Wish For.”  Yesterday I wrote that I fail to see I have many resentments in my life, and I probably encountered about a dozen of them yesterday, some large, some small, but all striving to ruin my day. 

So today I am going to write on the topic of  ridding yourself of resentments, and this, more than any post I have written so far, is entirely, in the moment, self-serving… a visual reminder of what I need to do, right now, in my life.

The first thing I have learned when you are in the moment of a resentment is to practice restraint.  For me, this usually means removing myself from the resentful situation, as tactfully and gracefully as I possibly can.  Because when I am angry or frustrated, my first reaction is NEVER my best one, so I need time and space to allow perspective.

Next, I need to turn it over to God.  Some people might call this step listening to their conscience, but for me my conscience is God, and in the end it is semantics, for the action steps are the same.  Quiet your mind.  Really… that’s it.  Once I quiet that self-righteous, loud voice in my head telling me that I have been wronged, the peace comes almost instantaneously, as does direction on the next right thing to do.  The trick is two-fold:  learning to talk back to that loud persistent voice, and to do it in an expedient fashion.  Because the more wronged I feel, the longer it takes me to quiet the voice, which only creates a lack of peace in my life for that much longer.

Finally, once I have quieted the voice, and the path becomes clear, I need to actually follow the path.  Whether it is apologizing for my part in the incident, forgiving the person or situation I feel has wronged me, or just simply moving on with life, there is no time like the present… I must, as Nike says, just do it.

And then the peace will come, and sanity will be restored.

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Posted on June 5, 2012, in Recovery and tagged , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 1 Comment.

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